Sept. 19, 2024
860. When did you stop wondering & start wandering?
When did you stop wondering? What happened? Who or what killed it & what did you do to plug the hole where it was ripped from?
The good news is that you can stop & start right now.
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Keep it simple. Keep it moving. Never settle. Stay tough.
Transcript
WEBVTT
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I want to read to you.
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Something that.
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Just really is profound.
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And I titled this episode.
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When did you stop?
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Wondering.
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And began.
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Wandering.
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And I'm adding the emphasis on the "a" wandering around stumbling bumbling.
00:00:27.870 --> 00:00:28.949
And we lost our wonder.
00:00:31.019 --> 00:00:36.149
And, you know, pick up this passage from gay Hendrix's book, conscious living.
00:00:38.130 --> 00:00:39.869
And it was so profound, man.
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It just.
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It just leaped.
00:00:45.060 --> 00:00:46.859
Leaped, whatever the word is.
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It just jumped out there at me.
00:00:49.320 --> 00:00:50.880
So, let me read this to you, man.
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Gay Hendricks rights.
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If you keep your wonder alive.
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You're on the path of conscious living.
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When your wonder dies.
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When you quit asking the big questions.
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When you settle into a life of roles.
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Rituals.
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Routines.
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And really just.
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A comfortable life.
00:01:20.170 --> 00:01:22.989
You begin to live a life of justification.
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Rather than a life.
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Of exploration.
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And when you turn into a life of justification.
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Something precious.
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Dies within you.
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You know, I can tell you this firsthand.
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That every day.
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The.
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Walls of judgment.
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An opinion.
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I constantly try to squeeze in on me.
00:02:11.409 --> 00:02:12.550
Especially as I get older.
00:02:14.379 --> 00:02:15.759
And the wolves.
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Of.
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Satisfaction.
00:02:21.039 --> 00:02:22.210
And complacency.
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Are always nipping at my heels.
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And that is something, man, that you have to realize.
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Is never going to go away for you.
00:02:32.889 --> 00:02:34.689
It's always going to be there for you.
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And I'm blessed.
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To know.
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That reading every day.
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Writing.
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And sharing.
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I have become that.
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Forcing function for me.
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It's become my morning ritual.
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That.
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Keep the walls of.
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Judgment and opinion.
00:03:07.819 --> 00:03:09.169
From closing in on me.
00:03:10.250 --> 00:03:11.870
And they keep the wolves.
00:03:12.829 --> 00:03:15.079
Of satisfaction and complacency.
00:03:16.549 --> 00:03:17.659
They keep them at bay.
00:03:18.409 --> 00:03:28.699
But if you think for one minute that you're ever going to get to a certain level in life, And not have to deal with uncertainty, adversity, and complacency.
00:03:29.150 --> 00:03:30.979
It's just going to be set it and forget it.
00:03:32.719 --> 00:03:34.219
You're going to be in for a hard life.
00:03:35.090 --> 00:03:36.169
It's never going to go away.
00:03:39.829 --> 00:03:40.490
And so.
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The actions of reading.
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In writing.
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And communicating.
00:03:53.810 --> 00:03:54.919
What I read and write.
00:03:55.430 --> 00:03:59.090
Oftentimes just with myself, I just use the medium.
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Of a podcast, but that's not for everybody, but I use the medium of a podcast.
00:04:06.438 --> 00:04:08.030
To articulate that message.
00:04:08.389 --> 00:04:19.249
If anything, if for no other reason, if nobody listened to any of these episodes, It's a way for me to.
00:04:23.249 --> 00:04:29.928
write Spend time with myself, unpack the thoughts, interpret it.
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What does it mean to me?
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And it cultivates wonder.
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And prevents me from caving.
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into wandering wandering.
00:04:44.279 --> 00:04:45.060
Stumbling.
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And bumbling around the Hendrix goes on to say, That when he.
00:04:51.899 --> 00:04:54.509
He was a therapist when he worked with clients.
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He would have the clients.
00:04:56.738 --> 00:05:01.358
Bring in childhood photos at various ages and stages in their life.
00:05:02.559 --> 00:05:04.988
And he said there was always one photo.
00:05:06.728 --> 00:05:07.988
That showed a time.
00:05:10.329 --> 00:05:11.889
When wonder.
00:05:12.249 --> 00:05:14.288
Was no longer visible on their face.
00:05:17.199 --> 00:05:18.309
And he asked them.
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What happened?
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What killed it?
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And how did you plug the hole?
00:05:30.189 --> 00:05:31.329
Where it was ripped from.
00:05:35.379 --> 00:05:37.149
That is such a powerful.
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Image.
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You go back and look at.
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Old photos of yourself.
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Childhood or various stages.
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I bet you, you could spot it in yourself real quick.
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The turning point.
00:06:02.589 --> 00:06:03.279
What happened?
00:06:06.129 --> 00:06:07.238
Who or what killed it?
00:06:11.288 --> 00:06:12.728
And what did you do to plug the hole?
00:06:15.819 --> 00:06:17.529
And you plugged it probably with.
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Accepting.
00:06:21.009 --> 00:06:21.759
Giving up.
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Probably numbed yourself to the pain.
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With vices.
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Eating drinking.
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Toxic people.
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Work.
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Just gave up.
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When was that time for you?
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When was that time for you that you lost?
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You're wonder.
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And just accepted a life.
00:06:58.418 --> 00:06:59.178
Of wandering.
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Accepting a life.
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Of it is what it is.
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see had I not been committed to.
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Writing something every day.
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And really.
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I wandered into this.
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I stumbled.
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Into.
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Reading and writing.
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I didn't read my first book until I was 25.
00:07:30.288 --> 00:07:32.119
I got all through high school.
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Mostly through college.
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I have 18 hours and never finished.
00:07:36.589 --> 00:07:37.939
But mostly through college.
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Never read a book.
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And.
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The first book I ever read was because I was just trying to figure out.
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How to get out of the casino life.
00:07:51.408 --> 00:07:52.098
And get into.
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A real job.
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No shade to those who work at a casino or just, it just wasn't for me.
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And so I just, I didn't see a future.
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Let me say it like that.
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I didn't see a future.
00:08:04.939 --> 00:08:06.139
In that field.
00:08:07.699 --> 00:08:09.528
And I began to wonder.
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Because I was tired of wandering.
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And that's what happens.
00:08:16.670 --> 00:08:18.468
We live in three points in life.
00:08:19.550 --> 00:08:24.170
Point a wake up point B go to work point C, go to bed.
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Rinse and repeat.
00:08:27.680 --> 00:08:29.899
And life gets stale, boring.
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Uh, depressing.
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And we just give up.
00:08:38.458 --> 00:08:40.558
So when I was at my lowest point in life.
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The only thing I could turn to was reading.
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So.
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I began to read.
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But then I wanted to do something with what I read.
00:08:57.809 --> 00:08:58.469
And so.
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I wandered.
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Emphasis on the a, I wandered into writing.
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I just started writing word for word.
00:09:11.458 --> 00:09:11.999
And see.
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The reading.
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And the.
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Writing.
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Began to cultivate.
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The wonder.
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I began to question.
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What I was reading.
00:09:33.809 --> 00:09:36.239
And instead of writing word for word.
00:09:37.859 --> 00:09:43.589
Because sometimes you have to borrow someone else's voice and thinking until you can develop your own.
00:09:43.589 --> 00:09:45.299
I was at a tough point in my life.
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Dark point.
00:09:46.708 --> 00:09:47.489
Suicidal.
00:09:48.809 --> 00:09:49.619
Giving up.
00:09:50.519 --> 00:09:51.149
Wandering.
00:09:53.369 --> 00:09:55.318
And so that mechanism.
00:09:55.948 --> 00:10:00.929
Began to make me pick up the pen and wonder.
00:10:04.229 --> 00:10:05.458
What is my life about?
00:10:07.019 --> 00:10:08.129
Where am I going?
00:10:10.828 --> 00:10:12.059
What are my dreams?
00:10:13.559 --> 00:10:14.818
How far can I go?
00:10:16.619 --> 00:10:18.328
How can I get out of this mess?
00:10:19.438 --> 00:10:21.389
How can I get my life back on track?
00:10:22.708 --> 00:10:25.349
How can I attract good people into my life?
00:10:26.999 --> 00:10:28.948
How can I do something more?
00:10:30.599 --> 00:10:31.828
With the talents.
00:10:32.879 --> 00:10:34.289
The God has blessed me with.
00:10:36.688 --> 00:10:38.219
And so that act.
00:10:39.269 --> 00:10:40.019
Of reading.
00:10:41.849 --> 00:10:42.658
And writing.
00:10:47.999 --> 00:10:48.778
Began.
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To put me on the path of embodying.
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Living that life.
00:10:58.798 --> 00:10:59.938
And then sharing it with you.
00:11:03.219 --> 00:11:06.849
I can tell you this, that the last episode, episode 8 59.
00:11:08.349 --> 00:11:09.458
Who was critical for me.
00:11:11.198 --> 00:11:12.099
Because.
00:11:15.969 --> 00:11:18.489
Wondering and wandering.
00:11:19.688 --> 00:11:21.849
Uh, really, really close to one another.
00:11:23.408 --> 00:11:25.538
And if you're not cautiously.
00:11:27.308 --> 00:11:28.089
Wondering.
00:11:29.619 --> 00:11:30.369
Questioning.
00:11:31.359 --> 00:11:32.948
Asking big questions.
00:11:35.109 --> 00:11:37.149
Looking at what you're doing every day.
00:11:38.948 --> 00:11:44.739
And performing a process that cultivates that, not just do the process, but actually just triggers it.
00:11:45.158 --> 00:11:46.658
If you're not doing that.
00:11:47.349 --> 00:11:49.208
You're going to slip into.
00:11:50.558 --> 00:11:51.278
Wondering.
00:11:52.658 --> 00:11:53.889
Drifting along.
00:11:55.658 --> 00:11:56.469
Point a.
00:11:57.249 --> 00:12:00.698
To point B to point C wake up.
00:12:01.749 --> 00:12:02.678
Go to work.
00:12:03.428 --> 00:12:04.269
Go home.
00:12:04.958 --> 00:12:05.918
Rinse and repeat.
00:12:08.769 --> 00:12:10.928
And you slip into this life of.
00:12:11.769 --> 00:12:12.788
Complacency.
00:12:14.109 --> 00:12:15.759
And you justify it away.
00:12:17.408 --> 00:12:19.028
And over beers you say.
00:12:23.139 --> 00:12:24.249
This is what I could have done.
00:12:27.369 --> 00:12:28.839
So last week's episode.
00:12:32.198 --> 00:12:34.599
And putting in a, a small grading system.
00:12:36.399 --> 00:12:37.178
Has become.
00:12:38.769 --> 00:12:39.849
A powerful.
00:12:40.269 --> 00:12:42.068
Reflective mechanism for me.
00:12:42.609 --> 00:12:43.448
In the mornings.
00:12:44.889 --> 00:12:46.839
Super simple grade one to five.
00:12:48.308 --> 00:12:51.249
Yesterday, how well did you communicate one to five?
00:12:52.208 --> 00:12:54.428
Five being the best one being not so good.
00:12:56.109 --> 00:12:56.798
Yesterday.
00:12:58.058 --> 00:12:59.109
How creative were you?
00:13:00.639 --> 00:13:01.418
One to five.
00:13:01.688 --> 00:13:02.918
How curious were you?
00:13:03.399 --> 00:13:04.149
One to five.
00:13:04.749 --> 00:13:06.639
What did you learn today?
00:13:07.149 --> 00:13:07.899
One to five.
00:13:08.948 --> 00:13:11.078
What did you confront in yourself?
00:13:11.349 --> 00:13:12.578
And possibly others.
00:13:13.269 --> 00:13:14.048
One to five.
00:13:15.158 --> 00:13:16.688
Just give myself a quick grade.
00:13:17.948 --> 00:13:19.658
And it brings in awareness.
00:13:21.219 --> 00:13:22.719
It makes me question.
00:13:24.609 --> 00:13:26.589
What did I do yesterday?
00:13:28.568 --> 00:13:30.578
And how can I build on that?
00:13:31.538 --> 00:13:32.889
And improve on that.
00:13:34.658 --> 00:13:35.828
For the rest of my life.
00:13:38.528 --> 00:13:40.239
In short, how can I.
00:13:41.198 --> 00:13:42.068
Wonder.
00:13:43.899 --> 00:13:45.009
And not wonder.
00:13:46.808 --> 00:13:47.948
Because you can't.
00:13:48.519 --> 00:13:49.418
Just coast.
00:13:49.658 --> 00:13:50.528
You can't.
00:13:51.278 --> 00:13:52.119
Just think.
00:13:53.168 --> 00:13:55.269
That this is enough.
00:13:55.808 --> 00:13:56.798
This is good.
00:13:57.578 --> 00:13:58.568
There's more for you.
00:13:59.229 --> 00:14:00.849
And I'm not talking about money.
00:14:01.688 --> 00:14:03.489
I'm talking about wealth.
00:14:04.269 --> 00:14:08.918
Spiritual mental, physical, financial.
00:14:09.609 --> 00:14:10.599
Relational.
00:14:12.328 --> 00:14:13.500
I'm so grateful.
00:14:14.549 --> 00:14:16.649
For these messages I got to share with you.
00:14:17.730 --> 00:14:19.769
Because I share them with myself.
00:14:21.389 --> 00:14:22.620
And it makes me question.
00:14:23.279 --> 00:14:24.059
What am I doing?
00:14:24.720 --> 00:14:25.590
Where am I going?
00:14:26.370 --> 00:14:27.419
What is it leading to?
00:14:28.679 --> 00:14:29.698
Is it progressive?
00:14:30.659 --> 00:14:31.769
Is it impactful?
00:14:32.490 --> 00:14:33.419
For my family.
00:14:33.929 --> 00:14:34.919
For myself.
00:14:36.688 --> 00:14:38.188
And for the community at large.
00:14:39.600 --> 00:14:42.419
My daughter's in a crucial stage in her life right now.
00:14:43.679 --> 00:14:44.639
Critical Sage.
00:14:45.328 --> 00:14:47.159
She's a junior in high school.
00:14:47.429 --> 00:14:50.370
And so now she's at the point where she's questioning.
00:14:51.809 --> 00:14:54.149
What do I want to do after high school?
00:14:54.179 --> 00:14:58.679
It becomes a sobering reality that, oh my God, I'm about to be an adult.
00:14:58.948 --> 00:15:00.688
Like what happens after this?
00:15:01.379 --> 00:15:02.519
And instead of just.
00:15:04.559 --> 00:15:07.438
Wandering into doing what everybody else does.
00:15:07.438 --> 00:15:12.149
And they wonder into college and rack up hundreds of thousands of dollars of student loan debt.
00:15:12.240 --> 00:15:14.789
And I was explaining to her, so you can't bankrupt that.
00:15:15.360 --> 00:15:17.549
You can't just say, oh, that plan didn't work.
00:15:18.029 --> 00:15:19.198
They're going to send you a bill.
00:15:19.470 --> 00:15:24.870
And what happens is, as I was explaining to her, what happens is, is people.
00:15:25.860 --> 00:15:28.289
Youth, they get into college.
00:15:28.470 --> 00:15:29.818
They just do something.
00:15:30.029 --> 00:15:31.649
Most times they drop out.
00:15:31.649 --> 00:15:34.318
If they do finish, they re-enroll because they still don't know.
00:15:34.350 --> 00:15:36.000
Won't know what they want to do.
00:15:36.419 --> 00:15:37.919
So they just get another degree.
00:15:37.948 --> 00:15:40.919
Are they just wonder out of college?
00:15:41.578 --> 00:15:44.220
And they have to grab the first thing.
00:15:44.818 --> 00:15:48.419
That pays the bills and covers the student loan debt.
00:15:50.039 --> 00:15:51.600
And that's where the trap.
00:15:52.259 --> 00:15:53.100
Get set.
00:15:53.698 --> 00:15:57.360
Actually the trap was set way before junior year in high school.
00:15:57.419 --> 00:15:58.409
What do I want to do?
00:16:00.809 --> 00:16:01.769
And so I'm telling her.
00:16:02.219 --> 00:16:04.350
I support you in whatever you want to do.
00:16:05.009 --> 00:16:07.620
But I'm glad that you're asking these questions.
00:16:08.399 --> 00:16:09.029
What do I do?
00:16:09.029 --> 00:16:13.080
And at any time you can cut bait and go a different direction.
00:16:13.620 --> 00:16:18.448
Sometimes it's good to dig in other times, it's good to not chase the sunk cost.
00:16:18.899 --> 00:16:19.469
And say.
00:16:20.039 --> 00:16:22.499
This isn't for me, whatever it is.
00:16:23.309 --> 00:16:24.958
And that you constantly question.
00:16:25.499 --> 00:16:26.370
What you're doing.
00:16:28.469 --> 00:16:35.249
And I'm grateful that I can help her with this because my three sons, I didn't do that.
00:16:35.909 --> 00:16:43.708
I didn't do that because I was wandering I was just working in sales, working a gig.
00:16:44.249 --> 00:16:44.879
Making.
00:16:46.019 --> 00:16:47.969
A hundred thousand dollars a year.
00:16:48.659 --> 00:16:50.279
Whatever it was one 50.
00:16:50.999 --> 00:16:52.350
Got a nice car.
00:16:53.009 --> 00:16:54.899
Got a house with a swimming pool.
00:16:56.279 --> 00:16:56.999
Wake up.
00:16:58.019 --> 00:16:58.769
Go to work.
00:16:59.249 --> 00:17:00.059
Come home.
00:17:00.600 --> 00:17:01.409
New month.
00:17:01.769 --> 00:17:02.909
Back to zero.
00:17:03.629 --> 00:17:04.769
Fight to get the month.
00:17:05.108 --> 00:17:06.750
great month, poor month.
00:17:06.868 --> 00:17:07.589
Start over.
00:17:09.059 --> 00:17:11.789
Well, they were looking at dad and they were like, well, this is what he does.
00:17:11.789 --> 00:17:12.868
This is what I'm going to do.
00:17:14.909 --> 00:17:16.949
And so they were shoved out in the life.
00:17:18.630 --> 00:17:19.769
wandering along.
00:17:22.469 --> 00:17:25.920
Because I was wandering and I'd stopped.
00:17:26.369 --> 00:17:27.029
Wondering.
00:17:28.650 --> 00:17:30.119
And asking the big questions.
00:17:32.619 --> 00:17:33.609
I won't allow that.
00:17:35.559 --> 00:17:36.369
for my daughter.
00:17:37.869 --> 00:17:39.579
And I won't allow that for my wife.
00:17:42.349 --> 00:17:43.549
I won't let them wander.
00:17:45.980 --> 00:17:47.720
Because I start my mornings.
00:17:48.529 --> 00:17:49.339
Wondering.
00:17:50.029 --> 00:17:51.710
It sets the tone, the reading.
00:17:52.369 --> 00:17:53.269
The writing.
00:17:53.690 --> 00:17:54.559
The sharing.
00:17:55.849 --> 00:17:58.069
The communicating with myself and others.
00:18:01.549 --> 00:18:02.509
Sets the tone.
00:18:04.609 --> 00:18:05.779
Instead of sets the trap.
00:18:08.599 --> 00:18:10.250
And let me tell you this what's beautiful.
00:18:12.200 --> 00:18:12.589
Number one.
00:18:12.589 --> 00:18:13.670
I want you to question.
00:18:15.920 --> 00:18:17.180
When did I lose my wonder?
00:18:17.869 --> 00:18:18.650
What happened?
00:18:19.220 --> 00:18:20.210
Who or what killed it?
00:18:22.640 --> 00:18:23.990
What do I do to plug the hole?
00:18:24.710 --> 00:18:25.430
Question that.
00:18:25.970 --> 00:18:27.410
Don't get too down in the rabbit hole.
00:18:27.470 --> 00:18:28.789
Don't kick the can down the road.
00:18:29.539 --> 00:18:30.170
Because.
00:18:31.190 --> 00:18:32.119
Immediately.
00:18:32.660 --> 00:18:34.430
As soon as you hear this message.
00:18:35.599 --> 00:18:37.339
You can stop wandering.
00:18:38.269 --> 00:18:39.500
Stumbling along.
00:18:41.599 --> 00:18:42.619
And begin to wonder.
00:18:45.019 --> 00:18:46.700
What else is there for me, dude?
00:18:46.700 --> 00:18:48.049
I'm 51 years old.
00:18:50.299 --> 00:18:51.829
I have squandered.
00:18:54.619 --> 00:18:54.859
If.
00:18:55.880 --> 00:18:57.109
Being generous.
00:18:58.099 --> 00:18:59.779
At least two decades of my life.
00:19:01.309 --> 00:19:02.779
I could spend that time.
00:19:04.369 --> 00:19:05.119
Wandering.
00:19:06.019 --> 00:19:06.650
Saying.
00:19:08.180 --> 00:19:08.869
What happened?
00:19:09.230 --> 00:19:10.579
What happened to the time?
00:19:11.480 --> 00:19:13.430
Arkan spend the rest of my life.
00:19:14.269 --> 00:19:14.990
Wondering.
00:19:17.480 --> 00:19:18.470
What can I do from here?
00:19:19.700 --> 00:19:20.630
That's what I want for you.
00:19:28.039 --> 00:19:28.730
Let's get out of here.
00:19:29.150 --> 00:19:29.839
Keep it simple.
00:19:30.019 --> 00:19:30.740
Keep it moving.
00:19:31.490 --> 00:19:32.210
Never settle.
00:19:33.259 --> 00:19:34.470
Stay tough peace.
00:00:01.080 --> 00:00:02.129
I want to read to you.
00:00:02.669 --> 00:00:03.689
Something that.
00:00:04.349 --> 00:00:07.440
Just really is profound.
00:00:08.490 --> 00:00:10.199
And I titled this episode.
00:00:10.859 --> 00:00:12.240
When did you stop?
00:00:13.619 --> 00:00:14.400
Wondering.
00:00:15.539 --> 00:00:16.199
And began.
00:00:16.469 --> 00:00:17.219
Wandering.
00:00:18.510 --> 00:00:24.629
And I'm adding the emphasis on the "a" wandering around stumbling bumbling.
00:00:27.870 --> 00:00:28.949
And we lost our wonder.
00:00:31.019 --> 00:00:36.149
And, you know, pick up this passage from gay Hendrix's book, conscious living.
00:00:38.130 --> 00:00:39.869
And it was so profound, man.
00:00:39.869 --> 00:00:40.380
It just.
00:00:43.140 --> 00:00:44.250
It just leaped.
00:00:45.060 --> 00:00:46.859
Leaped, whatever the word is.
00:00:47.159 --> 00:00:48.719
It just jumped out there at me.
00:00:49.320 --> 00:00:50.880
So, let me read this to you, man.
00:00:53.219 --> 00:00:54.420
Gay Hendricks rights.
00:00:54.990 --> 00:00:57.990
If you keep your wonder alive.
00:00:58.950 --> 00:01:00.840
You're on the path of conscious living.
00:01:02.590 --> 00:01:03.939
When your wonder dies.
00:01:05.109 --> 00:01:07.569
When you quit asking the big questions.
00:01:08.590 --> 00:01:12.129
When you settle into a life of roles.
00:01:12.730 --> 00:01:13.689
Rituals.
00:01:14.109 --> 00:01:15.039
Routines.
00:01:15.609 --> 00:01:16.689
And really just.
00:01:17.530 --> 00:01:18.819
A comfortable life.
00:01:20.170 --> 00:01:22.989
You begin to live a life of justification.
00:01:24.939 --> 00:01:26.439
Rather than a life.
00:01:28.120 --> 00:01:29.259
Of exploration.
00:01:31.359 --> 00:01:34.390
And when you turn into a life of justification.
00:01:37.450 --> 00:01:38.560
Something precious.
00:01:38.859 --> 00:01:39.939
Dies within you.
00:01:47.799 --> 00:01:53.049
You know, I can tell you this firsthand.
00:01:54.909 --> 00:01:56.140
That every day.
00:02:00.909 --> 00:02:01.539
The.
00:02:02.409 --> 00:02:04.689
Walls of judgment.
00:02:05.890 --> 00:02:06.789
An opinion.
00:02:06.789 --> 00:02:10.840
I constantly try to squeeze in on me.
00:02:11.409 --> 00:02:12.550
Especially as I get older.
00:02:14.379 --> 00:02:15.759
And the wolves.
00:02:17.020 --> 00:02:17.590
Of.
00:02:19.060 --> 00:02:20.229
Satisfaction.
00:02:21.039 --> 00:02:22.210
And complacency.
00:02:23.590 --> 00:02:25.210
Are always nipping at my heels.
00:02:26.199 --> 00:02:28.930
And that is something, man, that you have to realize.
00:02:30.250 --> 00:02:31.930
Is never going to go away for you.
00:02:32.889 --> 00:02:34.689
It's always going to be there for you.
00:02:39.579 --> 00:02:40.569
And I'm blessed.
00:02:41.740 --> 00:02:42.490
To know.
00:02:47.030 --> 00:02:48.379
That reading every day.
00:02:49.969 --> 00:02:50.719
Writing.
00:02:51.139 --> 00:02:52.009
And sharing.
00:02:52.009 --> 00:02:54.680
I have become that.
00:02:55.400 --> 00:02:57.049
Forcing function for me.
00:02:57.409 --> 00:02:59.240
It's become my morning ritual.
00:03:01.370 --> 00:03:01.969
That.
00:03:03.349 --> 00:03:04.609
Keep the walls of.
00:03:05.900 --> 00:03:07.280
Judgment and opinion.
00:03:07.819 --> 00:03:09.169
From closing in on me.
00:03:10.250 --> 00:03:11.870
And they keep the wolves.
00:03:12.829 --> 00:03:15.079
Of satisfaction and complacency.
00:03:16.549 --> 00:03:17.659
They keep them at bay.
00:03:18.409 --> 00:03:28.699
But if you think for one minute that you're ever going to get to a certain level in life, And not have to deal with uncertainty, adversity, and complacency.
00:03:29.150 --> 00:03:30.979
It's just going to be set it and forget it.
00:03:32.719 --> 00:03:34.219
You're going to be in for a hard life.
00:03:35.090 --> 00:03:36.169
It's never going to go away.
00:03:39.829 --> 00:03:40.490
And so.
00:03:41.479 --> 00:03:44.120
The actions of reading.
00:03:46.189 --> 00:03:47.060
In writing.
00:03:49.819 --> 00:03:51.079
And communicating.
00:03:53.810 --> 00:03:54.919
What I read and write.
00:03:55.430 --> 00:03:59.090
Oftentimes just with myself, I just use the medium.
00:03:59.990 --> 00:04:05.569
Of a podcast, but that's not for everybody, but I use the medium of a podcast.
00:04:06.438 --> 00:04:08.030
To articulate that message.
00:04:08.389 --> 00:04:19.249
If anything, if for no other reason, if nobody listened to any of these episodes, It's a way for me to.
00:04:23.249 --> 00:04:29.928
write Spend time with myself, unpack the thoughts, interpret it.
00:04:29.988 --> 00:04:31.218
What does it mean to me?
00:04:34.619 --> 00:04:36.298
And it cultivates wonder.
00:04:39.598 --> 00:04:41.369
And prevents me from caving.
00:04:41.369 --> 00:04:43.259
into wandering wandering.
00:04:44.279 --> 00:04:45.060
Stumbling.
00:04:46.079 --> 00:04:51.029
And bumbling around the Hendrix goes on to say, That when he.
00:04:51.899 --> 00:04:54.509
He was a therapist when he worked with clients.
00:04:54.839 --> 00:04:56.250
He would have the clients.
00:04:56.738 --> 00:05:01.358
Bring in childhood photos at various ages and stages in their life.
00:05:02.559 --> 00:05:04.988
And he said there was always one photo.
00:05:06.728 --> 00:05:07.988
That showed a time.
00:05:10.329 --> 00:05:11.889
When wonder.
00:05:12.249 --> 00:05:14.288
Was no longer visible on their face.
00:05:17.199 --> 00:05:18.309
And he asked them.
00:05:20.139 --> 00:05:20.889
What happened?
00:05:22.178 --> 00:05:22.959
What killed it?
00:05:25.478 --> 00:05:27.098
And how did you plug the hole?
00:05:30.189 --> 00:05:31.329
Where it was ripped from.
00:05:35.379 --> 00:05:37.149
That is such a powerful.
00:05:38.738 --> 00:05:39.279
Image.
00:05:44.978 --> 00:05:45.939
You go back and look at.
00:05:48.098 --> 00:05:49.389
Old photos of yourself.
00:05:51.249 --> 00:05:53.259
Childhood or various stages.
00:05:56.738 --> 00:05:58.839
I bet you, you could spot it in yourself real quick.
00:05:59.499 --> 00:06:00.548
The turning point.
00:06:02.589 --> 00:06:03.279
What happened?
00:06:06.129 --> 00:06:07.238
Who or what killed it?
00:06:11.288 --> 00:06:12.728
And what did you do to plug the hole?
00:06:15.819 --> 00:06:17.529
And you plugged it probably with.
00:06:18.968 --> 00:06:19.749
Accepting.
00:06:21.009 --> 00:06:21.759
Giving up.
00:06:25.689 --> 00:06:27.579
Probably numbed yourself to the pain.
00:06:30.009 --> 00:06:30.879
With vices.
00:06:33.158 --> 00:06:34.509
Eating drinking.
00:06:34.959 --> 00:06:35.949
Toxic people.
00:06:37.779 --> 00:06:38.379
Work.
00:06:40.298 --> 00:06:40.988
Just gave up.
00:06:43.749 --> 00:06:44.769
When was that time for you?
00:06:47.829 --> 00:06:49.928
When was that time for you that you lost?
00:06:51.129 --> 00:06:51.879
You're wonder.
00:06:54.939 --> 00:06:56.538
And just accepted a life.
00:06:58.418 --> 00:06:59.178
Of wandering.
00:07:01.449 --> 00:07:02.559
Accepting a life.
00:07:05.319 --> 00:07:06.879
Of it is what it is.
00:07:10.848 --> 00:07:13.098
see had I not been committed to.
00:07:14.689 --> 00:07:16.189
Writing something every day.
00:07:17.478 --> 00:07:18.259
And really.
00:07:19.579 --> 00:07:21.769
I wandered into this.
00:07:22.848 --> 00:07:23.629
I stumbled.
00:07:24.228 --> 00:07:24.978
Into.
00:07:25.939 --> 00:07:27.079
Reading and writing.
00:07:27.168 --> 00:07:29.538
I didn't read my first book until I was 25.
00:07:30.288 --> 00:07:32.119
I got all through high school.
00:07:33.019 --> 00:07:34.098
Mostly through college.
00:07:34.129 --> 00:07:35.869
I have 18 hours and never finished.
00:07:36.589 --> 00:07:37.939
But mostly through college.
00:07:38.269 --> 00:07:39.108
Never read a book.
00:07:41.119 --> 00:07:41.629
And.
00:07:42.288 --> 00:07:46.399
The first book I ever read was because I was just trying to figure out.
00:07:47.119 --> 00:07:49.548
How to get out of the casino life.
00:07:51.408 --> 00:07:52.098
And get into.
00:07:52.759 --> 00:07:53.598
A real job.
00:07:54.829 --> 00:07:58.339
No shade to those who work at a casino or just, it just wasn't for me.
00:07:59.389 --> 00:08:01.158
And so I just, I didn't see a future.
00:08:01.158 --> 00:08:02.119
Let me say it like that.
00:08:02.180 --> 00:08:03.619
I didn't see a future.
00:08:04.939 --> 00:08:06.139
In that field.
00:08:07.699 --> 00:08:09.528
And I began to wonder.
00:08:10.790 --> 00:08:13.939
Because I was tired of wandering.
00:08:15.348 --> 00:08:16.670
And that's what happens.
00:08:16.670 --> 00:08:18.468
We live in three points in life.
00:08:19.550 --> 00:08:24.170
Point a wake up point B go to work point C, go to bed.
00:08:25.098 --> 00:08:26.089
Rinse and repeat.
00:08:27.680 --> 00:08:29.899
And life gets stale, boring.
00:08:29.899 --> 00:08:31.819
Uh, depressing.
00:08:35.389 --> 00:08:36.169
And we just give up.
00:08:38.458 --> 00:08:40.558
So when I was at my lowest point in life.
00:08:45.869 --> 00:08:48.239
The only thing I could turn to was reading.
00:08:49.379 --> 00:08:50.129
So.
00:08:51.208 --> 00:08:52.349
I began to read.
00:08:53.969 --> 00:08:56.789
But then I wanted to do something with what I read.
00:08:57.809 --> 00:08:58.469
And so.
00:09:00.239 --> 00:09:01.109
I wandered.
00:09:02.818 --> 00:09:06.359
Emphasis on the a, I wandered into writing.
00:09:07.708 --> 00:09:09.568
I just started writing word for word.
00:09:11.458 --> 00:09:11.999
And see.
00:09:13.589 --> 00:09:14.399
The reading.
00:09:16.589 --> 00:09:17.309
And the.
00:09:17.818 --> 00:09:18.539
Writing.
00:09:23.519 --> 00:09:25.619
Began to cultivate.
00:09:26.729 --> 00:09:27.479
The wonder.
00:09:28.948 --> 00:09:30.119
I began to question.
00:09:31.679 --> 00:09:32.609
What I was reading.
00:09:33.809 --> 00:09:36.239
And instead of writing word for word.
00:09:37.859 --> 00:09:43.589
Because sometimes you have to borrow someone else's voice and thinking until you can develop your own.
00:09:43.589 --> 00:09:45.299
I was at a tough point in my life.
00:09:45.328 --> 00:09:46.019
Dark point.
00:09:46.708 --> 00:09:47.489
Suicidal.
00:09:48.809 --> 00:09:49.619
Giving up.
00:09:50.519 --> 00:09:51.149
Wandering.
00:09:53.369 --> 00:09:55.318
And so that mechanism.
00:09:55.948 --> 00:10:00.929
Began to make me pick up the pen and wonder.
00:10:04.229 --> 00:10:05.458
What is my life about?
00:10:07.019 --> 00:10:08.129
Where am I going?
00:10:10.828 --> 00:10:12.059
What are my dreams?
00:10:13.559 --> 00:10:14.818
How far can I go?
00:10:16.619 --> 00:10:18.328
How can I get out of this mess?
00:10:19.438 --> 00:10:21.389
How can I get my life back on track?
00:10:22.708 --> 00:10:25.349
How can I attract good people into my life?
00:10:26.999 --> 00:10:28.948
How can I do something more?
00:10:30.599 --> 00:10:31.828
With the talents.
00:10:32.879 --> 00:10:34.289
The God has blessed me with.
00:10:36.688 --> 00:10:38.219
And so that act.
00:10:39.269 --> 00:10:40.019
Of reading.
00:10:41.849 --> 00:10:42.658
And writing.
00:10:47.999 --> 00:10:48.778
Began.
00:10:49.828 --> 00:10:52.288
To put me on the path of embodying.
00:10:53.489 --> 00:10:54.719
Living that life.
00:10:58.798 --> 00:10:59.938
And then sharing it with you.
00:11:03.219 --> 00:11:06.849
I can tell you this, that the last episode, episode 8 59.
00:11:08.349 --> 00:11:09.458
Who was critical for me.
00:11:11.198 --> 00:11:12.099
Because.
00:11:15.969 --> 00:11:18.489
Wondering and wandering.
00:11:19.688 --> 00:11:21.849
Uh, really, really close to one another.
00:11:23.408 --> 00:11:25.538
And if you're not cautiously.
00:11:27.308 --> 00:11:28.089
Wondering.
00:11:29.619 --> 00:11:30.369
Questioning.
00:11:31.359 --> 00:11:32.948
Asking big questions.
00:11:35.109 --> 00:11:37.149
Looking at what you're doing every day.
00:11:38.948 --> 00:11:44.739
And performing a process that cultivates that, not just do the process, but actually just triggers it.
00:11:45.158 --> 00:11:46.658
If you're not doing that.
00:11:47.349 --> 00:11:49.208
You're going to slip into.
00:11:50.558 --> 00:11:51.278
Wondering.
00:11:52.658 --> 00:11:53.889
Drifting along.
00:11:55.658 --> 00:11:56.469
Point a.
00:11:57.249 --> 00:12:00.698
To point B to point C wake up.
00:12:01.749 --> 00:12:02.678
Go to work.
00:12:03.428 --> 00:12:04.269
Go home.
00:12:04.958 --> 00:12:05.918
Rinse and repeat.
00:12:08.769 --> 00:12:10.928
And you slip into this life of.
00:12:11.769 --> 00:12:12.788
Complacency.
00:12:14.109 --> 00:12:15.759
And you justify it away.
00:12:17.408 --> 00:12:19.028
And over beers you say.
00:12:23.139 --> 00:12:24.249
This is what I could have done.
00:12:27.369 --> 00:12:28.839
So last week's episode.
00:12:32.198 --> 00:12:34.599
And putting in a, a small grading system.
00:12:36.399 --> 00:12:37.178
Has become.
00:12:38.769 --> 00:12:39.849
A powerful.
00:12:40.269 --> 00:12:42.068
Reflective mechanism for me.
00:12:42.609 --> 00:12:43.448
In the mornings.
00:12:44.889 --> 00:12:46.839
Super simple grade one to five.
00:12:48.308 --> 00:12:51.249
Yesterday, how well did you communicate one to five?
00:12:52.208 --> 00:12:54.428
Five being the best one being not so good.
00:12:56.109 --> 00:12:56.798
Yesterday.
00:12:58.058 --> 00:12:59.109
How creative were you?
00:13:00.639 --> 00:13:01.418
One to five.
00:13:01.688 --> 00:13:02.918
How curious were you?
00:13:03.399 --> 00:13:04.149
One to five.
00:13:04.749 --> 00:13:06.639
What did you learn today?
00:13:07.149 --> 00:13:07.899
One to five.
00:13:08.948 --> 00:13:11.078
What did you confront in yourself?
00:13:11.349 --> 00:13:12.578
And possibly others.
00:13:13.269 --> 00:13:14.048
One to five.
00:13:15.158 --> 00:13:16.688
Just give myself a quick grade.
00:13:17.948 --> 00:13:19.658
And it brings in awareness.
00:13:21.219 --> 00:13:22.719
It makes me question.
00:13:24.609 --> 00:13:26.589
What did I do yesterday?
00:13:28.568 --> 00:13:30.578
And how can I build on that?
00:13:31.538 --> 00:13:32.889
And improve on that.
00:13:34.658 --> 00:13:35.828
For the rest of my life.
00:13:38.528 --> 00:13:40.239
In short, how can I.
00:13:41.198 --> 00:13:42.068
Wonder.
00:13:43.899 --> 00:13:45.009
And not wonder.
00:13:46.808 --> 00:13:47.948
Because you can't.
00:13:48.519 --> 00:13:49.418
Just coast.
00:13:49.658 --> 00:13:50.528
You can't.
00:13:51.278 --> 00:13:52.119
Just think.
00:13:53.168 --> 00:13:55.269
That this is enough.
00:13:55.808 --> 00:13:56.798
This is good.
00:13:57.578 --> 00:13:58.568
There's more for you.
00:13:59.229 --> 00:14:00.849
And I'm not talking about money.
00:14:01.688 --> 00:14:03.489
I'm talking about wealth.
00:14:04.269 --> 00:14:08.918
Spiritual mental, physical, financial.
00:14:09.609 --> 00:14:10.599
Relational.
00:14:12.328 --> 00:14:13.500
I'm so grateful.
00:14:14.549 --> 00:14:16.649
For these messages I got to share with you.
00:14:17.730 --> 00:14:19.769
Because I share them with myself.
00:14:21.389 --> 00:14:22.620
And it makes me question.
00:14:23.279 --> 00:14:24.059
What am I doing?
00:14:24.720 --> 00:14:25.590
Where am I going?
00:14:26.370 --> 00:14:27.419
What is it leading to?
00:14:28.679 --> 00:14:29.698
Is it progressive?
00:14:30.659 --> 00:14:31.769
Is it impactful?
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For my family.
00:14:33.929 --> 00:14:34.919
For myself.
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And for the community at large.
00:14:39.600 --> 00:14:42.419
My daughter's in a crucial stage in her life right now.
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Critical Sage.
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She's a junior in high school.
00:14:47.429 --> 00:14:50.370
And so now she's at the point where she's questioning.
00:14:51.809 --> 00:14:54.149
What do I want to do after high school?
00:14:54.179 --> 00:14:58.679
It becomes a sobering reality that, oh my God, I'm about to be an adult.
00:14:58.948 --> 00:15:00.688
Like what happens after this?
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And instead of just.
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Wandering into doing what everybody else does.
00:15:07.438 --> 00:15:12.149
And they wonder into college and rack up hundreds of thousands of dollars of student loan debt.
00:15:12.240 --> 00:15:14.789
And I was explaining to her, so you can't bankrupt that.
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You can't just say, oh, that plan didn't work.
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They're going to send you a bill.
00:15:19.470 --> 00:15:24.870
And what happens is, as I was explaining to her, what happens is, is people.
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Youth, they get into college.
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They just do something.
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Most times they drop out.
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If they do finish, they re-enroll because they still don't know.
00:15:34.350 --> 00:15:36.000
Won't know what they want to do.
00:15:36.419 --> 00:15:37.919
So they just get another degree.
00:15:37.948 --> 00:15:40.919
Are they just wonder out of college?
00:15:41.578 --> 00:15:44.220
And they have to grab the first thing.
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That pays the bills and covers the student loan debt.
00:15:50.039 --> 00:15:51.600
And that's where the trap.
00:15:52.259 --> 00:15:53.100
Get set.
00:15:53.698 --> 00:15:57.360
Actually the trap was set way before junior year in high school.
00:15:57.419 --> 00:15:58.409
What do I want to do?
00:16:00.809 --> 00:16:01.769
And so I'm telling her.
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I support you in whatever you want to do.
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But I'm glad that you're asking these questions.
00:16:08.399 --> 00:16:09.029
What do I do?
00:16:09.029 --> 00:16:13.080
And at any time you can cut bait and go a different direction.
00:16:13.620 --> 00:16:18.448
Sometimes it's good to dig in other times, it's good to not chase the sunk cost.
00:16:18.899 --> 00:16:19.469
And say.
00:16:20.039 --> 00:16:22.499
This isn't for me, whatever it is.
00:16:23.309 --> 00:16:24.958
And that you constantly question.
00:16:25.499 --> 00:16:26.370
What you're doing.
00:16:28.469 --> 00:16:35.249
And I'm grateful that I can help her with this because my three sons, I didn't do that.
00:16:35.909 --> 00:16:43.708
I didn't do that because I was wandering I was just working in sales, working a gig.
00:16:44.249 --> 00:16:44.879
Making.
00:16:46.019 --> 00:16:47.969
A hundred thousand dollars a year.
00:16:48.659 --> 00:16:50.279
Whatever it was one 50.
00:16:50.999 --> 00:16:52.350
Got a nice car.
00:16:53.009 --> 00:16:54.899
Got a house with a swimming pool.
00:16:56.279 --> 00:16:56.999
Wake up.
00:16:58.019 --> 00:16:58.769
Go to work.
00:16:59.249 --> 00:17:00.059
Come home.
00:17:00.600 --> 00:17:01.409
New month.
00:17:01.769 --> 00:17:02.909
Back to zero.
00:17:03.629 --> 00:17:04.769
Fight to get the month.
00:17:05.108 --> 00:17:06.750
great month, poor month.
00:17:06.868 --> 00:17:07.589
Start over.
00:17:09.059 --> 00:17:11.789
Well, they were looking at dad and they were like, well, this is what he does.
00:17:11.789 --> 00:17:12.868
This is what I'm going to do.
00:17:14.909 --> 00:17:16.949
And so they were shoved out in the life.
00:17:18.630 --> 00:17:19.769
wandering along.
00:17:22.469 --> 00:17:25.920
Because I was wandering and I'd stopped.
00:17:26.369 --> 00:17:27.029
Wondering.
00:17:28.650 --> 00:17:30.119
And asking the big questions.
00:17:32.619 --> 00:17:33.609
I won't allow that.
00:17:35.559 --> 00:17:36.369
for my daughter.
00:17:37.869 --> 00:17:39.579
And I won't allow that for my wife.
00:17:42.349 --> 00:17:43.549
I won't let them wander.
00:17:45.980 --> 00:17:47.720
Because I start my mornings.
00:17:48.529 --> 00:17:49.339
Wondering.
00:17:50.029 --> 00:17:51.710
It sets the tone, the reading.
00:17:52.369 --> 00:17:53.269
The writing.
00:17:53.690 --> 00:17:54.559
The sharing.
00:17:55.849 --> 00:17:58.069
The communicating with myself and others.
00:18:01.549 --> 00:18:02.509
Sets the tone.
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Instead of sets the trap.
00:18:08.599 --> 00:18:10.250
And let me tell you this what's beautiful.
00:18:12.200 --> 00:18:12.589
Number one.
00:18:12.589 --> 00:18:13.670
I want you to question.
00:18:15.920 --> 00:18:17.180
When did I lose my wonder?
00:18:17.869 --> 00:18:18.650
What happened?
00:18:19.220 --> 00:18:20.210
Who or what killed it?
00:18:22.640 --> 00:18:23.990
What do I do to plug the hole?
00:18:24.710 --> 00:18:25.430
Question that.
00:18:25.970 --> 00:18:27.410
Don't get too down in the rabbit hole.
00:18:27.470 --> 00:18:28.789
Don't kick the can down the road.
00:18:29.539 --> 00:18:30.170
Because.
00:18:31.190 --> 00:18:32.119
Immediately.
00:18:32.660 --> 00:18:34.430
As soon as you hear this message.
00:18:35.599 --> 00:18:37.339
You can stop wandering.
00:18:38.269 --> 00:18:39.500
Stumbling along.
00:18:41.599 --> 00:18:42.619
And begin to wonder.
00:18:45.019 --> 00:18:46.700
What else is there for me, dude?
00:18:46.700 --> 00:18:48.049
I'm 51 years old.
00:18:50.299 --> 00:18:51.829
I have squandered.
00:18:54.619 --> 00:18:54.859
If.
00:18:55.880 --> 00:18:57.109
Being generous.
00:18:58.099 --> 00:18:59.779
At least two decades of my life.
00:19:01.309 --> 00:19:02.779
I could spend that time.
00:19:04.369 --> 00:19:05.119
Wandering.
00:19:06.019 --> 00:19:06.650
Saying.
00:19:08.180 --> 00:19:08.869
What happened?
00:19:09.230 --> 00:19:10.579
What happened to the time?
00:19:11.480 --> 00:19:13.430
Arkan spend the rest of my life.
00:19:14.269 --> 00:19:14.990
Wondering.
00:19:17.480 --> 00:19:18.470
What can I do from here?
00:19:19.700 --> 00:19:20.630
That's what I want for you.
00:19:28.039 --> 00:19:28.730
Let's get out of here.
00:19:29.150 --> 00:19:29.839
Keep it simple.
00:19:30.019 --> 00:19:30.740
Keep it moving.
00:19:31.490 --> 00:19:32.210
Never settle.
00:19:33.259 --> 00:19:34.470
Stay tough peace.